When offered the chance to donate to the
Acumen Fund in exchange for getting an
advanced copy of Seth Godin’s book,
Linchpin, I jumped at the chance.

In true practice-what-you-preach form,
Godin sent several emails after my
donation letting me know the status
of my book shipment.  When I received
the book, there was a letter included
from Godin which shocked me by
commencing, “The scariest words an
author can write are, ‘here’s my new
book.’”  I thought, Seth Godin…scared?  Cool.
I was hooked from the start.  Even after I realized that what I was reading was the table of contents.  I devoured the book in a day and a half.  Then I went back to re-read and take notes.  It’s THAT profound.

I’ve written a letter to you and to everyone in response to this book.

Dear Everyone I’ve Ever Cared About or Ever Will,

Have you ever wondered why you were put on this earth?  Even in passing?  Questioned whether you were making the most of your potential?  I have.  I do.

Because I see the genius in you that sometimes you forget to acknowledge, I have a recommendation for you.  It’s a book called Linchpin by Seth Godin.  Out the 26^th of January, just 6 days from now.  Get it.  Read it.  Read it again.  My hope is that it will inspire and educate you as it has me.

I won’t attempt to do Godin’s concepts justice by summarizing them here.  But know this.  The world needs your unique talents and your voice now more than ever.  You’re hard-wired to resist this “risky” contribution to society but you have the choice to overcome this resistance.  To deliver on your own greatness.  To dream big.  Draw your own map.  Whether you’re self-employed or an employee, this book will change your perspective.  If you have kids or work with kids, it’s a must-read.

Stand up to embrace your role as a “Linchpin” and join the ranks of those changing the world in their own special way.  And, please, once you’ve opened the door to inspiration, let me know so we can walk this road together.

It’s not often that I recommend books this strongly.  So do me, yourself and mankind a favor and check this one out!

Of course I know that the most successful people make and write their goals down.  But it’s that “checking in” part that seems to elude me.

Last year, I had a conversation with a friend of mine about how cool it would be if we could work on our goals together and find some type of web-based program that would email us quarterly or monthly as a reminder to check in on our collective goals.  I’m sure the tools existed last year but maybe we never bothered to check it out online.  So this year, I did check it out online and found several free applications where you can send an email to yourself at a future date.  The one I ended up choosing was LetterMeLater.com.  Just took a minute to plug in my name and email address.  And maybe I’ll even use it.  Maybe.

Then I came across Benjamin Franklin’s “13 Virtues” Plan, which I had never heard of.  The story goes that on an 80-day voyage from London to Philadelphia, Franklin came up with plan and 13 virtues, around which he would structure his life.  His plan entailed focusing on one virtue each week and he developed a matrix visually showing the days of the week and each of his virtues.  At the end of each day, he’d evaluate his own behavior for that particular day and make a mark in the corresponding box if he failed to demonstrate that particular virtue.

I like Franklin’s system for several reasons.  One, it forces to you to think about the virtues important to you and your life.  Certainly they’d be different than Franklin’s but they’re great for example’s sake.  Two, it’s a daily reminder and evaluation of your own behavior each day.  This to me is almost more powerful than setting New Year’s Resolutions that are made and forgotten quickly.  The other thing it’s important to remember is that Franklin was on a boat.  For 80 days.  In the middle of nowhere.  I can only image that he had plenty of time with which to reflect, something that’s hard to come by in today’s society.

At the end of the day, I know I’ll set some goals for 2010.  This year, I’m going to do a better job of attempting to keep track of them, maybe even mix up the format a bit.  Maybe my first goal of 2010 will be “Only undertake activities to which I’m fully committed.”

And so this letter got me thinking about perfection.  The opportunity cost of perfection.  The difference between excellence and perfection.

Interestingly, when I looked up “perfection” in Wikipedia, it provided pages upon pages of historical origins, references, contexts – so much more than I could have imagined.  One of the things that stood out to me was under the “Physics and Chemistry” subheading.  Various concepts of “perfection” were outlined – many of which were not naturally occurring but rather an ideal…states that didn’t exist unless chemically manipulated.  For example, “The physicist designates as a perfectly rigid body, one that ‘is not deformed by forces applied to it.’ He uses the concept in the full awareness that this is a fictitious body, that no such body exists in nature. The concept is an ideal construct.”  Or  “A perfect fluid is one that is incompressible and non-viscous — this, again, is an ideal fluid that does not exist in nature.”

And isn’t this what we, as a society, have attempted to do?  To appear perfect, like my friend’s Christmas card, we manipulate our own reality….to our friends, to our family, to our customers.  I read, with horror, that Jennifer Hudson lip-synched her perfect rendition of the Star-Spangled Banner at the Super Bowl and that the inaugural performance by Yo-Yo-Ma and Itzhak Perlman was pre-recorded.  Does excellence have to equal perfection?  And at what cost?  How much effort and time are you putting into this manipulation – into appearing to be something you’re not?

The other part of the Wikipedia history lesson that I found incredibly interesting was the historical paradox of perfection and the theory that true perfection was, in fact, imperfection.  That if the world were truly perfect, there would be nothing to strive for, nothing to improve upon.  Think about this from your own experience.  You’re probably the person you are today, the business owner you are today because of the lessons you’ve learned from the past.  Somehow I doubt you’d label those lessons as examples of your own personal perfection.

And here’s the thing about manipulating reality to conjure up this smokescreen of perfection.  No one’s buying it.  And if they do buy it, they’ll pass you by because they can’t relate.  By creating a zip code in Perfectville in which your family or your business supposedly lives, you build walls that alienate you from “your people”.  And trust me, you need “your people”.

Now, all this being said, consider an alternate definite of perfection:  that which completely achieves its purpose, or that which is fully harmonious.  Now these are definitions of perfection that may be worth striving for.  But this assumes you know your purpose and refer to it often.  It assumes you know the elements that must be in harmony in your business and your life.  It assumes a “realness” that not everyone is ready to reveal.  It takes courage to strive for this type of perfection.  So go ahead, be the perfectionist – just change your definition of perfection.

From the beginning of our relationship with this vendor, we were introduced to the Sales Manager, a gregarious, likable guy with a mean sense of humor that we’ll call “John”.  At the beginning of our relationship, we didn’t have much contact with John, dealing with rotating account reps on our project.  As things started going south, we began having more and more contact with John, bypassing the account reps to deal directly with him.  He was the one person in the vendor organization that leveled with us, seemed to understand our perspective and advocated on our behalf with the Web Developer and CEO.

Even when things got rough and our frustration level grew, he continued to answer the phone…sometimes at odd hours of the night…and talked us off the ledge.  In hindsight, he was put in a terribly difficult position – representing his company while still trying to advocate for us, the customer, even when our position wasn’t popular.  He maintained the only level of professionalism we saw from that vendor after our initial meeting.    We trusted him and felt comfortable continuing to be honest with him.  We kept him in the loop for the most part, even when our attorney got involved.

It would’ve been easier for him to write us off as a “difficult client” and shy away from advocating on our behalf.  It would’ve been easier to lie.  To conceal.  To allow our calls to go unanswered.  But he didn’t.  He stepped up to face the music, played the intermediary between us and the vendor.  To ensure the success of the project.  To ensure that we had a website after investing pretty much all the capital we had.

All the tools we’ve discussed over the past week in this blog are valuable and useful for entrepreneurs and small business owners and can bring your project to the next level, to be sure.  But at the end of the day, it truly does come down to the people with whom you interact.  Their integrity level.  Their belief in what you’re trying to accomplish.  And similarly, your integrity level, your commitment to the project.  So, above all else, pay attention to the people.  Their purpose.  Your purpose.  Do they match?  If not, keep moving.

We were fortunate enough to happen upon a “project angel” in John, for which we remain eternally grateful.  The lessons John taught us about maintaining professionalism and integrity in a firestorm may be the most valuable thing we learned through our tumultuous experience.  At the end of the day, projects get done because outstanding people are committed to getting them done.

So you’re thinking about going it alone and starting your own business.  Perhaps it’s something you’ve always dreamed of doing.  Perhaps it’s a hobby on the side begging to take center stage.  Perhaps it’s a brand new venture.  First, and most importantly…good for you!  It’s easy to be lulled into complacency by the familiar.  If you’re reading this letter, my suspicion is that you’re the type of person who refuses to incorporate “common”, “good enough” or “average” into your vernacular.  Greetings, kindred spirit.

Choose to accept this challenge and discover your inner entrepreneur and you’ll embark on a journey that will fundamentally change who you are and how you see the world around you.  Scared?  Good.  You should be.  A healthy dose of fear will keep you on your toes, push you to do your best and, probably most importantly, keep your ego at bay, at least for a little while, encouraging you to learn all you can.  Choose to explore the uncharted territory beneath those feelings of fear and discover the gift of excitement lying in wait.  Welcome that excitement with open arms.

Whatever your venture of choice, this is an undertaking you should take very, very seriously.  Give it the time, the thought, the planning it deserves.  It will likely take longer, more money and more energy to accomplish your goals than you ever anticipated.  But rest assured, no matter the outcome, the journey will be well worth the effort because, at the end of the day, your growth and perspective will catapult you into a level of resourcefulness that will serve you for life.

The name of the game is action.  Set out a plan for yourself and follow it.  Reject analysis paralysis.  You’ll never know it all, so polish up the basics and get moving, one step at a time.

Not everyone will support your decision or understand why you’re choosing to leave the security of the known to put it on the line and risk a shot at the entrepreneurial life, the unknown.  Some people, even those who know you best, may look at you with skepticism.  Bring it on!  Not everyone is cut out to be an entrepreneur.  Your job is to believe in yourself and find others who believe in you to support your efforts along the way and pick you up when you fall.  It takes an amazing amount of courage to break out of the mold and carve your own path in this world.  I commend you and encourage you on this journey.

With you in mind, I humbly bring you the top tips I’ve personally learned along the way, most of which stem from learning the hard way. Items with asterisks will be discussed in more detail in future blog posts.

1)  Read Start with Why and figure out YOUR “Why”.  Ensure any business venture you undertake closely aligns with your “Why”.  When you know your “Why”, you’ll be able to hang in there when the going gets tough and make your mark on this world, inspiring people as you blaze a trail.

2)  Read E-Myth by Michael Gerber and Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki if you haven’t already.  They’re quick but important reads.

3)  Have a plan.  Try Palo Alto Software for business planning software.  Know where you’re headed.  Once you figure out your plan for getting from Point A to Point B, put it to the side and plan it all over again from scratch, not using any of the same steps.  Once you’ve done this, set that aside and then do it again.  Why?  Because when you hit a roadblock, you’ll have a plan “B” and a plan “C”  to fall back on.  It’s preemptive flexibility that you’ll be grateful for in the long run (thanks to Steve Linder for this idea).

4)  Choose your partnerships carefully.  Whether a business partnership or a key vendor, choose cautiously and choose well.  There’s a reason they call it “Due Diligence” – it’s something you MUST DO!

5)  Know how to write and read a contract.  Be diligent in doing so.***

6)  Start as you wish to end up.  Don’t want to be tied to your business in 5 years, where nothing can happen unless you’re at your desk?  Design it from the start so you have the systems in place to allow your business to run without you.  A great exercise is to graph out the organizational chart of your future business 5 years from now.  ***

7)  Document everything.  For really important conversations, record it.  ***

8)  Know the basics of all the aspects of your business, especially the finances.  Even if you’re not a numbers person, educate yourself to a basic level.  Sometimes it’s really just a numbers game but you need to know the rules of that game to recognize when the numbers don’t add up.  ***

9)  Start small but dream big.  Know your long term vision and goals and start small.  Do fewer things and do them incredibly well.  Then expand, building on your success.  Bite off more than you can chew in the beginning and you’re in for a rude awakening.

10)  Stay true to your integrity.  If you don’t have the highest levels of integrity then please, do us all a favor and don’t even throw your hat in the ring.  Refuse to deal with anyone whose integrity you question, which brings us to the next point.

11)  Trust your gut.  Ignore this rule at your peril.  If a contract, business partnership or direction doesn’t “feel” right, it’s probably not.

12)  Read The Dip by Seth Godin.  Knowing when to quit and when to hang in is critical for an entrepreneur.

13)  Evaluate yourself on a regular basis.  Schedule it.  Stick to it.  By getting this objective view regularly, you’ll make better decisions, able to check your emotions at the door.

14)  Use social media tools.  They’re predominantly free and incredibly powerful.***

15)  Use the appropriate level of technology.  You’re not NASA.  You don’t need a phone system for 15 people if it’s just you, even if it does have lots of cool bells and whistles.

16)  Network.  Find a supportive group of like-minded people.  This will increase your access to great and creative ideas, as well as moral support and years of experience in a variety of areas.  You’ll know these people when you find them because you’ll feel like you’ve finally found your home.

17)  Learn about general Project Management principles.  Most of the items with asterisks above have something to do with these principles that we’ll be discussing in more detail over the coming weeks.

I leave you with this quote from Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

With You in Spirit,

A Fellow Entrepreneur

We’ve discussed creating and honoring space to gain added clarity and creativity on decisions, ideas and direction.  Is there a “right way”‘ to best make use of this space we create?  I loved this post on Psychology Today, Stimulating Imagination Through Constraints, which discusses the paradoxical benefit of imposing parameters and structure around creative processes to enhance the quality of creative outcomes.

Their point?  It’s hard to be creative when someone gives a vague directive, “Write a Story.  Be creative”.  Hmmm….immediately your brain goes to work trying to create parameters around this mission:  A story, huh?  Should it be fiction or non-fiction?  First person or third?  Autobiographical or fantasy?  And on and on, worrying whether you’re doing it “right”.  Whereas if you’re given some built-in parameters, “Write a Children’s Story involving an Enchanted Wishing Well”, you mind immediately goes to work on filling in the more creative details and doesn’t have to worry about as many “rules”.

This has obvious implications from a business perspective.  Most of us have endured “brainstorming” meetings gone bad…some brilliant mind in the office has decided it’s time to “brainstorm” about the new year.  “Remember, no idea is a bad idea…the ground rules are that all ideas are accepted and no one makes negative comments about anything.”  The topic?  “Improving the business.  And….go!”  Everyone looks around at one another, internally rolling their eyes.  It’s not because group brainstorming is a bad idea, it’s because without the proper structure, no one knows where to focus their creative juices.  It’s much more fun to think of creative ways to get from point A to point B if you know where “A” and “B” are.

This concept of adding structure to gain freedom has application in multiple areas.  Think of parenting small children.  Without good structure and routine, kids flounder.  With well-defined limits on acceptable behavior, the entire family unit functions more smoothly.  Kids don’t have to constantly “test” to figure out where the limits are (not saying they won’t do this occasionally).  They’re more free to be able to concentrate on playing the game when they understand the rules.

Similarly (and my husband fights me on this on), scheduling free time allows you to more fully enjoy it.  If you have a plan for your day or week, you know you’ve addressed the important priorities.  When it comes time for your afternoon out with friends or a lazy evening reading, you’re more fully able to enjoy the time.  Other priorities aren’t as likely to interrupt your personal time.  The argument for structure, parameters and boundaries is an important one.

Where in your personal life could benefit from some structure?  What about your business?  If we seek a life of freedom, creativity and intention, it appears that spending some time creating boundaries and parameters may be our first homework assignment.

You may have noticed by now that the theme for this week is creating and honoring space…the space in which you sometimes find yourself, the space necessary to rejuvenate those creative juices.  So today we look at the space around us we choose to fill with relationships of all types.

We all have differing degrees of relationships at any given time in our life.  The degree to which we depend upon these relationships varies by individual, also.  Some of us choose to surround ourselves with just a few close friends while some of us prefer to have an endless list of people to call (or text or email) on any given day.  And apparently, we swap out friends on a periodic basis.  A study out of the Netherlands claims we replace half of our friends every 7 years.

Most of us don’t give whole lot of thought to our commitment to these relationships – if they’re positive, they just seem to float along effortlessly.  If they’re negative, we tend to either ditch them or make the choice to keep them and complain about them incessantly.  A concept I’ve recently been introduced to through Steve Linder is called the Hierarchy of Relationships.  Essentially, the Hierarchy of Relationships maps out the relationships in your life in concentric circles.  In the very middle are the foundational relationships in your life – those people for whom you’d do just about anything.  If they need you, you’re there and vice versa.  Linder refers to this as your “cabinet”.  The next circle represents your “peers”.  These are the people that mean a lot to you, you feel comfortable sharing most things with them and enjoy a positive relationship.  The next circle represents “friends”.  These are the people with whom you have contact and with whom you are friendly, but you either don’t know them well enough yet to trust them inherently or you’ve made the conscious decision not to place them higher up for whatever reason.  The next circle represents “acquaintances” and the final “strangers”, both relatively self-explanatory.

Here’s how this is useful.  Think about the people in your life that you’d place in your innermost circle, your “cabinet”.  What are the things they must do to remain in your cabinet and what are the things they must never do?  For example, “My cabinet must always be truthful with me, even if don’t want to hear it, because I know they have my best interest at heart.” and “My cabinet must never lie to me.”  Now, flip it around…what are the things YOU must do for your cabinet?  “I must be in touch at least once a week.”  “I must make an effort to see them in person at least once a month.” “I must be 100% honest, even if it hurts their feelings in the short run.” and so on.  Now think about the people in your life you’d place in the next circle, your “peers”.  List the responsibilities for each of you at that level and so on.  This tool is obviously the most useful at the highest levels.  Here’s why it’s a neat model:  Sometimes we encounter disappointment or surprise in friendships.  Maybe you were treating someone like a “cabinet” member, when in reality and judging by their actions, they were really a “peer”.  Had you realized this from the start, your expectations would’ve been in better alignment.  It allows you to be more intentional with your relationships.

Here’s a tip as you’re thinking about your “cabinet”, your innermost circle.  Being a blood relative does not buy someone a ticket into your cabinet.  Your brother may be a cabinet member while your mom falls under the peer category.  And that’s OK.  Again, the name of the game here is to both manage your expectations and to raise the bar for yourself in how you choose to treat and honor the relationships in your life.  If you say Johnny is your “best friend in the whole world” but you haven’t picked up the phone to check in for 6 months, you might want to take a look to see if you’re measuring up to your own expectations for how you want to show up for that friend.

Take a moment today and think about your innermost circle of relationships.  What are the expectations you have for those people?  What are the expectations you have for yourself relating to those people?  And…most importantly, are you living up to those expectations?

I recently read a blog post with a headline that read, Love Your 4 Day Vacation? Does that mean you DON’T love your job? The blog post was a good one that ended up being about flexible work schedules, of which I’m a huge fan but it didn’t address what I THOUGHT it would.  I thought it would be about how taking time off gives you a renewed outlook on your jobs, your projects, your life.  Isn’t that what vacation is for?

Everyone needs some time of “forced” vacation.  My hairdresser shared with me today that she spent the weekend doing some “serious soul searching” and ended up deciding to jump in and lease that new 1800 s/f space she’d been looking at and bring on up to 5 hairdressers to lease space from her – a huge shift from her one-woman, independent shop.  She confessed that, in part, the reason she was able to make the time and space necessary to make this decision was because “nothing was open”.

We are not a society of limited choices, of this I’m certain.  There are always things to do, places to go, money to burn.  Don’t get me wrong, I like doing all of these things as much as the next person and I’m grateful for the choices and freedoms we enjoy.  But sometimes, just sometimes, could we take some time to be alone and do some soul-searching and, at the risk of sounding new-age-ish, self-reflection?

When I entered the Peace Corps at the age of 22 and was placed in my site, I was a complete wreck.  Was it because I missed home?  Was it because I was overwhelmed with saving the world?  Was it because I didn’t have running water every day?  Was it because a huge rat lived in my kitchen sink?  Nope.  It was because, for what felt like the first time in my entire life, I was forced to spend time with myself.  A lot of time.  No TV, no radio, not much of a job to do.  No real friends to speak of.  No public library.  It was sheer hell.  But it was during that time that I learned more about myself than I had before or since that experience…no distractions, just me.  Go figure.

Every time I’ve created the space to think about a project at hand, a direction I’m considering, a new strategic partnership, amazing things happen.  One of my best ideas for a partnership project came from a long run where I made the space to just focus on tossing ideas around.  I made the decision to leave a beloved job after the birth of my first daughter on a beach in Hawaii.  Clarity seems to come more easily when you give it the space to exist.

And here’s the kicker.  If you don’t create space for your ideas, decisions and direction to exist but they’re still somewhere on your radar…guess what?  These things will take up precious emotional real estate.  On some level, you ARE thinking about many of these things all the time.  But by not giving them the space they deserve, all of these things begin to creep into places they shouldn’t – distracting you when you should be focused.  We’re so busy being busy on a daily basis (and yes, I’m guilty of this too) that we don’t realize that by NOT slowing down, by NOT taking the time we need to create space for reflection about these things, we’re actually shooting ourselves and our own progress right in the foot.  While the voice of these thoughts may start out as a whisper, they eventually grow into a roar if we choose not to listen.

A great quote by Andrew Jackson advises, “Always take all the time to reflect that circumstances permit, but when the time for action has come, stop thinking.”  Until we leave space for that reflection, it’s impossible to stop thinking.

For the sake of your sanity and your productivity, find a time to create that space for that thing you KNOW you need to address.  Take a few minutes each day and pick one thing on which to focus.  Or take a few hours each week.  While it may seem counterintuitive at first, when you do this regularly, the jump in your clarity and productivity will astound you.

And then, suddenly, a situation (or in some cases, situations) arises where you find yourself stuck in no-man’s land.  Maybe the decision’s been made and you’re ready to move on but circumstances require strategic waiting (and oh….the waiting…it’s almost physically painful). Or maybe you encounter a situation where a quick and simple decision eludes you…you, the effective, efficient decision maker!  You find yourself in a space that’s not comfortable because it doesn’t have a clear outcome.  You have no certainty in being able to see, touch, feel and visualize the next step.  Perhaps it’s a big decision.

But really, for those of us for whom this no-man’s land is a lonely, painful place…could there be a hidden gem to uncover?  Tempting as it may be to will it away…this empty, uncertain place…isn’t there growth here?  Patience is one offshoot that immediately comes to mind but no…it must be something deeper.  Trust.  Trust in the process.  Trust in knowing that no matter how many options you analyze…perhaps time and space rule supreme in this foreign land and only by putting your faith and trust in the process will hope and clarity reappear, after a slumber that seems unending.

Viktor E. Frankl is quoted as saying, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

We, as a society, are conditioned to minimize the space between stimulus and response.  But what are we missing as a result?  Have you ever rushed a decision to provide yourself with the certainty you craved only to realize that, in the end, it wasn’t the right choice?

Undoubtedly the ability to make quick and calculated decisions is critical to any high-functioning organization or individual.  The wise decision maker, however, realizes the power in knowing when to decide and when to allow that space to exist and seek the hidden growth.

Take a few minutes today to examine your business, your life.  When given an option, do you allow a space between stimulus and response?  How do you react when faced with an involuntary space?  Do you choose to react in panic and force a decision?  Or do you choose to recognize the gift in that space that, ultimately, opens the door to a much greater opportunity?